We have all invariably had to sit and take criticism of one form or another in our lives, usually from our manager, our family, or our partners; and the fact that this criticism comes from areas of our lives that are so critically important makes it even harder to take gracefully. There is simply too much at stake when it is your personal or professional life that is called into question.
So what do you do? Do you sit and take it gracefully, or do you argue every point? Which of these options shows you in the best light, after all you don’t want to appear intransigent or aggressive, but neither do you wish to be seen as passive and uncaring. Is there a third way, or many other ways? None of these things are coherently thought about during the process of being criticised, so it is worthwhile thinking about your approach beforehand. Here are 4 tips on how to show yourself in the best possible light when that criticism comes your way. The tips are geared towards work but are applicable in other areas of your life as well.
It is also important to distinguish at this point between criticism you are expecting and that which you are not. If for instance you are a sportsman you would expect criticism to be a part of your training and therefore necessary to work, this is quite different from a manager receiving criticism of his methods of managements following staffing issues that may have been reported at a higher level.
So, onto the tips.
1) Be open to the feedback and show this by listening actively. It is critical to the process that you are seen to be taking on board the points that are being made. If your manager or superior feels unable to get through to you with the points that he or she are trying to make, the outcome will not be in your favour.
2) Ensure you have your facts to hand; it is important for two reasons to be able to do this. Firstly, it provides the context to the criticism so that you are aware of why this is being raised as an issue, and secondly, it allows you to ensure that the version your superior has heard is largely accurate. After all, there is always another side to a story, and if a complaint has been made you can be sure it is likely to show your actions in a less than favourable light.
3) Address each point made individually and with tact. What I try to do is this; I try to address the specific point with my justifications for why it worked out the way it did but agree in broad terms that improvements need to be made going forward. This shows two things, that you are aware of the issues and have considered your approach (even if your result was wrong or not in line with company policy it shows you have given the actions and decisions due consideration) and secondly it shows that you are receptive to the points made and willing to improve future performance.
4) Follow up. After a meeting in which criticism has been levelled at you, ensure you follow up promptly with demonstrable results. Either cc your boss into emails, provide email updates or generate change within your team that is obvious to your boss. this shows that you have been receptive to the ideas and, more importantly, have actioned those changes in an appropriate way that is having an impact.
If this process can be followed you will find two things happen; one, you will receive less direct criticism and more options for change from management, who recognise that you are aware of the issues and can implement change effectively, and secondly, you will find that the processes of change within your team will be second nature, and you will have your superiors on side for changes you wish to make in the future, having demonstrated your ability to manage change already.
Shevek Pring 